Observing True Dysfunction from the Point of View of First Person An exciting and plausible theme no purchase deemed nessasery Viewing the Voyeur is Free Take into Consideration An Opiate Vacation When living in a dream within a dream Lucidity Is a Non neccesity A bowl of Milk A cup of Cream Prescription Pads Invisible Ink Transforming the Dull with Vivid Imagery Blue Purple Pink Pill Bottles Made Into Child Proof Baby Rattles Orange Yellow Green Aluminum Foil plastic Baggies Empty Bottles and Glass Pipes Pushing to pull Oily Residue Leaving you empty Stealing your youth Attempting to Feel Off a Life Unfulfilled Bottles of Wine Now Fun Sized Ready to Drink Easy to Hide Makes you feel good Makes you feel fine Grab a bottle and Go Socialize hear the clink clink clink of the wind chime As you take off your coat and hang it to dry The best part of the Day has yet to arrive Lay down in bed Relax your eyes Waiting to sleep like the dead While dreaming of life With the help of pain Meds Consciousness Subsides Relinquishing Needs and Silencing Crys The ceasing of thoughts Kills the will to survive Instinctional Goals Eat Fuck Fight Provide Instead of the struggle End the Plight Kill the Void with a Butcher Knife No need to feel guilty No need to cry End the timeline The circle of life It's okay Darling Everyone Dies

Day Three of the Three Day Cycle

Greatness I Am Bowing Down to Me the World is for My use Only I Regress Constantly on the Comedown I Am Failure to Complete the Things Now I'm doing Now Always Moving Shifting Squirming Warming Duldrums turn to Temper Tantrums Exibit A on The kitchen Floor Attention Whore Never to be ignored I proceed Oh look It's me Worshipping Collection Plate Knees Always On My mind Never Sleeps Never Fails to make a peep Constantly in My Mind Planning Things Obsessively Must Reorganize My cabnitry must sweep up Falling leaves Must Clean Must Clean Must CLEAN SHHH, shh, shh, Girl, The Bugs in the Wall can hear you think

Empty Vessel

Baby sank out of me.
Left this vessel
a
loose sack
Of skin and fingernails.

Body wasted.
Ruined.
Set aside to serve the next generation.

Oh.
What.
A.
Miracle.
Birth. is.

This one will grow up to be something great.

All that purple skin you will soon forget when you look into her eyes
for the first time.

But.
Every morning.
Every bath.
With.
Every.
Single.
change of clothes.
I am reminded
This vessel
has
served
Its purpose.

Mankind will continue on.
All
because of me.
The earth overpopulated.

You’re a mother now, dear.

You can’t do that.
Your life is changed now.
You don’t live just for you
Anymore.
Oh, when you look into her eyes for the first time

It won’t matter.

You live to serve her now.

They tell me. Over. And. Over.
And
Over.

No one cares
If you have stretch marks
Dear.

The Baby is all that matters now.

--Lindsay Strait 10-6-2010

"Weedy Bop"

Smiles and Grins
At Every Single Sighting of Him
Because
You See
The toes of This Girl
He makes Them curl
Every time He kisses Her Pearl
And when She comes
All over His Tongue
It tastes like His
Caribbean Rum
And Oh This Man
She loves Him so
And
Even Though
He stays in The Cut
Swagger His walk
Every time That He goes
She runs back to Him
Every time that He calls
Sweet Dick
Weedy Bop
With the Candy Bar Balls

Madonna in Progress

Flawed

On my

Charcoaled Pedestal

I am

Measured

Scribbled

Into

Newsprint Booklets

Never to be

Exhibited

Never to be

Revisited

Me

In True Form

Just a

Super Exhibitionist

Carefully shade me into gray

Forever and Always

I will Remain

Your Work

In Progress

Short Lived Life Expectancy

Boxed me In

The Doctor did

Told me

I Could Never Live

Not like this

Just

Not

Like

This

Self Preservation

Pick Pick Pick Until the nail bleeds Tear away the cuticle Bite the nails down Chew on the fingers That taste of nicotine Down Down Down Goes the enamel of the teeth Pick and Scratch
Until yellow fingertips Color themselves red Taste of blood Instead Instead

Instead of

Gnaw through damaged nails Just to get to Bite off the callus Chew the scaled skin between chipped teeth Grind fidgeting fingers Down into the wrist Repeat Do this Do this Do This

Do it Again

Bloody Scabs
Instead of hands
Make it
Impossible
To pick up

Fishbowl Mind

Fishbowl eyes

Stuck
On the rash
On the arm

It is
Redder
and
Redder

Does not
Cease
to grow

It climbs
limb
By
limb

Ever present
It eats away

First
It gets at the skin

Just a sink hole
Fishbowl Eyes

Seeing
Only
The
Inevitable

Void of Solutions
Harping

What’s outside?
What’s up there?

Surely
That fishbowl
Has an Opening
But

Fishbowl eyes

Can only see

From

Left
To
Right

Side
To
Side

Red Woman

Oh,
She lies, She lies,
She lies All the time, And
All the time, They cry, cry, cry,

Please, Please, Please,
Don’t lie to me.

Please, Please, Please,
Just be Mine.

And

Even though
They know, They know
They try their best to turn their head
Blind their eyes
Push up their nose
But
Blind eyes fail to quiet the mind
And still that whisper continues on
Continues to chime
Rings in their ear with that
Same old line

Oh,
She lies, She lies, She lies.

But
They know They know
Oh,
I know
That they know when I lie

And

Anymore
I don’t
Even bother to hide

Anymore
I Just
Don’t Even Try

But

Little did they Know that
Though
There were many
I loved them all
And
Little did they Know
That
Though
There were many
I loved them all--

I loved them all Full and Whole.

Man Meat Prey

Oh, Oh, Oh,
And all those Men
I forced Them In
I did I did
Caught Them
In their
Midnight Grin
Just told Me
They were full of Sin
I wanted In
I wanted Them
All one Man
But
Then again
All those
Other Men
I sucked Them In
I did I did
And
How were They to know that then
That
Every Man
Was just like Them
Just wanted In
And
How were They to know that then
That
Every Man
I
Lured In
Came In Came In
Came In again
That every Man
I lured In
I lured In
And
Just like Them
I Layed Them Down
In My
Lion’s Den
I Layed Them Down
Over and Over
And
Over Again.

To Miss Foxy Roxy

To Miss Foxy Roxy:

Oh Why, Oh why,
Did you turn so badly

Turn so badly
In my Belly

Turned my Throat
To Acid Jelly

Left me Purging
In Back Alleys

Signed,
Your faithful lover, Dirty Dan's sole survivor, Doting Don



And be sure to stay tuned for the upcoming "Doting Don's Dosing Dosier"

Miss Foxy Roxy

Miss Foxy Roxy
Bumpin all night
She’ll shoot you dead
Before she does you right

She comes on creeping
Makes you ill
She’s no candy coated
Sugar Pill

Miss Foxy Roxy
Addictive as hell
She’ll take all your money
And leave you a shell

With her Orange cap
And spoon in hand
She’ll tie you tighter
Than any rubber band can

Miss Foxy Roxy
Says, “come to bed”
Be careful, though, Boy
She’ll fuck you dead

Dirty Dan’s Decadent Demise

Low Down
Dirty Dan
Looks for Jobs
But none are Found
Without Work
No Money Perks
So Dirty Dan does his worse

Disapproved of
Dirty Dan
Cut his White Girl Down
Cooked her in Ceramic Pans
Watched as the Microwave
Turned her ‘Round

Devilish Dick
This Dirty Dan
Went from Soft to Hard
Kept this Girl in his Hand
And walked her to his car

But Dirty Dan
Soon found out
This Girl he did adore
Would not ever be enough
He’d always want some more

Disenchanted
Dirty Dan
Trying to make it Last
Went in too Deep
Then fell Asleep
She was Much
Too Much
For any Man




This is the first poem I have written so far for my "Lindsay's (Future) Book of Adult Nursery Rhymes."

See Cat Crocodile Smile

Cat Cortez, mountain climber extraordinaire
Wants you following examples
Says commercial TV
Midnight infomercials
Colored TVs
Agree
Nice girls need candy coated cabinetry
Matching cookware
George Foreman Grilles
Little blue pills
No-stick pans
Honey baked hams
See Cat care
Mountain climber extraordinaire
Every night
Midnight
On KATC


I wrote this early in the Fall 2008 semester for my Grammer class. The directions were to write either a poem or a paragraph leaving out the specified parts of speech. I made a 'D' in the class and recieved no credit for this assignment but I like the poem.

Contained Schizophrenia

My urine is bright orange
Due to the pills they made me swallow
Thankfully I’m not shallow
And those paranoid thoughts my mind adores
Though I swallow the pills they still come more
And that misplacing of my things….it seems
I blacked out and did myself
No need to make a scene
And though they medicate my three times a day
And the pills they prescribe calm me down and sedate
I still constantly debate
Should I kill myself now. . . if. . . if… this is my fate.



Another old poem written around the same time as "Marilyn" and "Monster Ego."

At this point, I feel I must mention--about a month before my enrollment in my first creative writing class I was released from Tyler Mental Health Acute Psychiatric Unit. Not my first time being committed and definitely not my last, I'll just admit that now. Though, I doubt there was any confusion in the reader's mind.

Marilyn

I am a kaleidoscope of interest In my multicolored universe I am a temptress
And though my activities can be described as outrageous You’ll all claim you know me When I’m rich and famous And I’ll probably die Of suicide As many legends do And I’ll be remembered as a good girl For the truth dies with me too.


This is another one of my old poems. Orginally, this poem had line breaks where the capitalized words are. I have been into this run-on sentence formatting for my poetry lately and a couple of months ago changed it to what you see now.

Monster Ego

Slighted light beams shine against the hard plastic of the visible glass looking
Optic sunflower seeds
Ghost sheets and Dirty cots
And the cushioned walls have become gray, lethargic; inner and outer rott.



I wrote this poem a few years ago for my first creative writing class at the South Louisiana Community College for Dr. Gaither. I was probably seventeen. Any poems that I label 'old' were most likely written around this time, including "Marilyn."

I would like to thank Dr. Gaither now--even though he'll probably never know it--he is one of the main reasons I decided to continue on in the Creative Writing program at UL.

--Lindsay

Decreement Agreement

My Baby
Habibi

Is Leaving

Me
Never

Shall be

To be
Seen
Dare He
Think
To do
A Thing
Think I

To not

Do Agree
Be so

Mean
Beg Him
Please
Never be

Not
Leaving
Me

Vice Box

Buried Box Bright Red
Resting
Underneath
My soggy
Sweat-Filled
Bed Keeping
Me
Residually
Residing
In My
Head
Death Bed
Dead White
Faded Lines
Stain its Lid
And
Yet Again
I Find Myself
Ill-equip
To Handle
It So
I give
In Yet
Again
I give in.

Foe Squirral Faux

Beatty Eyed Little Beasts
Constantly
Watching Me
Observing Things
No one Sees
These
Squirrals in the Trees